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American Tourists Say and Do the Craziest Things!
By Douglas Bower


Blackpool Hotels
I`ve had some memorable experiences in Blackpool over the years and when I was a young buck it would be a favourite party venue where I, along with a group of my mates, would enjoy the non-stop action. When you arrive in Blackpool you are greeted by the familiar seaside attractions that UK coastal resorts tend to offer and you are spoilt for choice for places to stay as there are countless guest houses and Blackpool Hotels to pick and choose from. I`ve actually lost count of the amount of Blackpool Hotels that I`ve stayed in both in the luxury and budget categories. In actual fact it`s perfectly possible to find a cracking bed and breakfast establishment that proves to be warm, welcoming and not too hard-hitting on the wallet. Many groups head to the Lancashire resort for hen or stag weekends and it`s easy to see why wwhen you take in the local nightlife and all of the fun activities that can be taken part in during the day. If you like kiss-me-quick hats, fish and chips, seafood and rock, bustling Blackpool should be one location that you put on your ?places to visit` list. The list of Blackpool Hotels that you can stay in is simply massive and they cater for everyone`s taste.

Rv Hire Uk
Spectacular scenery, beautiful beaches, delightful countryside and a warm welcome in quaint towns and villages, are just some of the many experiences that the UK has to offer the many visitors to its shores each year. There are theme parks and national parks, museums and countless places of interests that all need to be explored. Steeped in history you can visit a castle one day and then take in the delights of Buckingham Palace the next. Along the coast there are some charming little seaside towns and delightfful fishing harbours. To fully explore the country a recreation vehicle will be needed and Rv Hire Uk is readily available. Families or couples can hire an rv and they`ll be free to head off to where they like. The vehicles provided by the Rv Hire Uk firm are all modern examples of luxury motor homes. Inside they are packed with creature comforts to make life on the road a breeze. You can head from one location to the next in your Rv Hire Uk and be free to sample the many charms that Great Britain has to offer. Whether you want to hit the beaches in Newquay or sample country life in Yorkshire you`ll receive a warm welcome wherever you go.

Greece Diving Gets Better
Each year the sea life around Greece Diving and Paros gets better and better. In the last few dive trips we have seen many octopus, lobster and new varieties of fish arriving from the red sea. Whilst Greece Diving recently we have even seen dolphins and several species of nudibranch. These nudibranch are a rare sight in the red sea, and not usually native to the Aegean sea, nethertheless Greece Diving is attracting new attractions and there has never been a better time to go diving in Greece.


Each tourist season we collect these little anecdotes that American tourist seem so willing to provide. All we have to do is sit in the main plaza with pen and notebook in hand. Enjoy!

Old American Male: What`s there to do in this town?

Sweet Mexican woman: Have you tried visiting our city`s churches?

Old American Male: I`ve been all over the world and have seen more churches than I care to remember. I don`t need to see any more God d***ed churches.

High School American girls: Oh my God, can you believe the toilet paper dispenser was OUTSIDE the stall?

American Restaurant Patron: I asked for a "real" taco.

American cab rider: I want "real" money in change and not pesos.

American Student: Are all the Mexican women this fat?

American (Texan) Housewife: Do you realize just how corrupt your government is here?

American Freak-a-Zoid Hippie: I can`t believe you Americans (expats) who want to live in such a poor country.

American woman in tour-group: You shouldn`t feed your child something like that for breakfast! (She says this to a Mexican mother.)

American man fat and balding: They have no booze in this grocery store for Christ`s sake.

American Country Club Snobs: What do you mean there`s no golf course here?

American teenaged male: Where`s the mall so I can cruise for Mexican chicks?

American 10-year old: But I wanted a Happy-Meal!

American Redneck Hick: Donch y`all have no cafeterias down to where you`re from?

American Old Crow (female): Walks into a bank and begins screaming, "I know some mother-f***er employee here speaks English and I want to talk to them right now!"

American Senior Citizen: But I demand a Senior citizen`s discount on this roasted ear of corn.

American Hotel Patron: Why don`t you get ESPN?

San Miguel de Allende American Expat: Stands in front of a Mexican young person`s rock band and gives them "the finger" until the concert is disrupted.

Middle-aged American backpacker: Walks into a crowded restaurant and announces, "All Mexican women are b**ches".

Another American Redneck Hick: What kind of speech do y`all talk down here?

American Woman in English bookstore: She points to something she finds inappropriate and tells the owner it is a sacrilege that she has such an item.

Another chubby bald American: I am worried about all the graft in Mexico (I guess he doesn`t keep up on graft in America![1]

I have to make a comment here: Americans act as though America is the paragon of all that is good in the world. Where does this self-delusion come from? They are so quick to point out corruption in another country while wickedness of all sorts is going on right under their noses! Perhaps the Minuteman Project fanatics who blame the Mexican migrant workers for exploiting services should do a little self-examination at their own fraud...see footnoted quote!

Can someone please explain this to me?

So ends my story on Americans say and do the craziest things!

[1] Billions Misspent by Medicaid in New York State, Tuesday,

HealthIssues Daily Briefing, July 19, 2005

Billions Misspent by Medicaid in New York State A year-long investigation by the New York Times found that the New York state Medicaid program has been misspending billions of dollars annually because of "fraud, waste and profiteering." According to the Times, the program has become so huge, so complex and so lightly policed that it is easily exploited. NewYork`s Medicaid program spends about $44.5 billion annually, which is more than any other state, including California, whose Medicaid program covers about 55 percent more people.

EzineArticles Expert Author Douglas Bower
For more information about this article and/or the author visit http://www.lulu.com/mexicanliving

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